We are NOT helicopter parents

treading very lightly

treading very lightly

 We are NOT helicopter parents: An article in the HuffPost by WP blogger Cate at The Clear Parent which I think sooo many of us could relate to.

This is exactly what I want to say to teachers, even when they’re not arguing or condescending, just being very polite while I try to walk the line between looking after my child’s needs and getting all up in their faces.

And I really do try. But there’s that first day at a new school where you know your child’s anxiety is through the roof, but no one else can see it, because they sit where they’re supposed to, and do what they’re told without a fuss, and keep still and quiet, and don’t cry, but you can see it because it’s in their eyes like shards of glass, so you stand outside the class where they can see you and tell them you’ll be on campus for a while, because you know that once they get over the initial shock, they’ll be fine, and no one will ever know there was a trainwreck on the cards, because you prevented it by reading your child’s eyes when no one else could.

 

 

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12 thoughts on “We are NOT helicopter parents

  1. You’re a good mom. I can totally relate to the child you’re describing. And you are doing just what you should. Your child is quite lucky to have a mom who can see the things that are hidden from the world.

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    • Well you’ve just got to do your best when it’s your kid, eh? Anxiety’s a terrible thing. I’m not surprised you can relate – you could have been writing my life with some of your posts!

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      • And maybe that’s the whole point of all of it, right? If we have to go through all the crap, so our kids (or in my case, anybody’s kids…or maybe even just anybody) can have someone who understands…so they don’t have to go it alone, so they can have a better chance, it will all be worth it.

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      • Have thought long and hard about anxiety (wrote a piece called Anxiety’s Bitch on my other blog – haha, I think you get it) – but I’m still not sure if the anxiety is caused by being different and not understanding the world, or if it’s pre-existing in some of us, because it’s usually the same people who are both different (in some way) and anxious. Anxiety is a tough one to write about because writing about it can bring it on. I’m only able to now because I’m in remission 😉 I don’t intend to go down again though, hell no.

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      • So…how exactly does one get on the anxiety remission train, my friend? I want a ticket for that ride. I think anxiety can come from either place (or both). Some of us are different (in some way) and anxious…and I imagine the being different part can compound the anxiety, but I also think that some people are born without the predisposition to anxiety and that their being different creates the anxiety. I don’t know…you’re right; it’s complicated…and anxiety-inducing to write about. Ha ha… I do kinda think we are prone to anxiety because we feel things more deeply than others, which can be, well, you know, all kinds of intense.

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      • Thanks! I’ve just recently been getting into Ted Talks. (Actually been trying to listen during my commute…to avoid getting stressed out. Truth be told, I’ve only listened to one so far, so it’s VERY recent, but still.) I’ll definitely check it out!

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      • I’ve only just recently cottoned on to youtube for feeding my poor ADD brain lol! But shall we say my ‘to watch’ list is growing??

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      • But you know what, people with anxiety are the brave ones, as ironic as that might feel, because they’re the ones who go ahead and do stuff all the time even though they’re scared, and that’s called courage. So, respect!

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